The Columnist

一盏黄黄旧旧的灯时间在旁闷不吭声寂寞下手毫无分寸
不懂得轻重之分沉默支撑跃过陌生
静静看著凌晨黄昏你的身影失去平衡慢慢下沉
黑暗已在空中盘旋该往哪我看不见
也许爱在梦的另一端无法存活在真实的空间

想回到过去试著抱你在怀里羞怯的脸带有一点稚气
想看你的看的世界,想在你梦的画面
只要靠在一起就能感觉甜蜜想回到过去试著让故事继续
至少不再让你离我而去分散时间的注意
这次会抱得更紧这样挽留不知还来不来得及想回到过去

思绪不断阻挡著回忆播放盲目的追寻仍然空空荡荡
灰蒙蒙的夜晚睡意又不知躲到哪去
一转身孤单已躺在身旁

想笑来伪装掉下的眼泪
点点头承认自己会怕黑
我只求能借一点时间来陪
你却连同情都不给
想哭来试探自己麻痹了没
全世界好像只有我疲惫
无所谓反正难过就敷衍走一回
但愿绝望和无奈远走高飞
天灰灰会不会让我忘了你是谁
夜越黑梦违背难追难回味
我的世界将被摧毁也许事与愿违
累不累睡不睡单影无人相依偎
夜越黑梦违背有谁来安慰
我的世界将被摧毁或许颓废也是另一种美

想哭来试探自己麻痹了没
全世界好像只有我疲惫
无所无所谓反正难过就敷衍走一回
但愿绝望和无奈远走高飞
天灰灰会不会让我忘了你是谁
夜越黑梦违背难追难回味
我的世界将被摧毁
也许事与愿违
累不累睡不睡单影无人相依偎

We were as one babe
For a moment in time
And it seemed everlasting
That you would always be mine

You’ll always be a part of me
I’m a part of you indefinitely

Time can’t erase a feeling this strong
No way you’re never gonna shake me
Ooh darling cause you’ll always be my baby

And I remember that fight 2:30 AM
And everything was slippin’ right out of my hands
I ran out crying and you followed me out into the street

Braced myself for the goodbye,
Cause that’s all I’ve ever known
And you took me by surprise
You said “I’ll never leave you alone”

You are the best thing that’s ever been MINE

it’s what made me, saved me, drove me crazy
drove me away than embraced me
forgave me for all of my shortcomings

Let the rain wash away all the pain of yesterday
I know my kingdom awaits and they’ve forgiven my mistakes

Baby, a few day ago you asked me why i don’t update my blog anymore, so here it is and this might be the last entry already (since this blog is set up for you) =) Come to think about it, it’s really quite fast isn’t it, 1 year plus had already passed. I still love you alot you know and I really hope I can change to someone you can accept.

Thank you for accompanying me no matter how low I am, esp through some of those worser army days. I really really did my best to try to provide for you and tried to fulfill those all things that I promised you before. Hope that u at least enjoyed your birthday, valentine’s day, christmas, etc with me.

My baby is still and always will be silly silly and angry angry. Must take care of yourself k, since you always fall sick. Don’t drink cold drinks when blood blood come huh. No aircon when bi zi yang yang. Try to exercise more k (although i’m also guilty of that). Eat more veggie and less fried food. Take some enrichment courses as you mentioned, best is yoga. Try not to be so fierce and easily angry already k, being less angry will make u happier and more wrinkle free also. Walking that time must be careful k, don’t anyhow bang into stuff already. Take pride in yourself k, cos you know the truth that u are awesomer than alot of ppl. If can, go study first k, cos it’s always good for gals to study finish first than go work. Don’t complusive spending already, exercise self control k. Try to always be angel k, cos you are damn cute and lovable.

I really hope u don’t have to leave now baby, if you ever miss me or have some feeling back, please come back, i’ll be there k.

LOVE YOU A D B. BIG HUG HUG FOR ME PLS. JUST ONE ALSO HAPPY.

只剩下钢琴陪我谈了一天
睡著的大提琴 安静的旧旧的
我想你已表现的非常明白 我懂我也知道 你没有舍不得
你说你也会难过我不相信
牵著你陪著我 也只是曾经
希望他是真的比我还要爱你
我才会逼自己离开

你要我说多难堪 我根本不想分开
为什么还要我用微笑来带过
我没有这种天份 包容你也接受他
不用担心的太多 我会一直好好过
你已经远远离开 我也会慢慢走开
为什么我连分开都迁就著你
我真的没有天份 安静的没这么快
我会学著放弃你 是因为我太爱你

[Chorus - Rihanna]
Just gonna stand there and watch me burn
Well that’s alright because I like the way it hurts
Just gonna stand there and hear me cry
Well that’s alright because I love the way you lie
I love the way you lie

[Verse 1 - Eminem]
I can’t tell you what it really is
I can only tell you what it feels like
And right now there’s a steel knife in my windpipe
I can’t breathe but I still fight all I can fight
As long as the wrong feels right it’s like I’m in flight

High off of love, drunk from my hate
It’s like I’m huffin’ paint and I love her
The more I suffer, I suffocate
Right before I’m about to drown, she resuscitates
Me, she fuckin’ hates me and I love it, Wait!
Where you going? I’m leaving you.
No you ain’t. Come back. We’re running right back

Here we go again, it’s so insane
‘Cause when it’s going good, it’s going great
I’m Superman with the wind in his back
She’s Lois Lane, but when it’s bad, it’s awful
I feel so ashamed, I snapped, “Who’s that dude?”
I don’t even know his name
I laid hands on her, I’ll never stoop so low again
I guess I don’t know my own strength

[Chorus - Rihanna]
Just gonna stand there and watch me burn
Well that’s alright because I like the way it hurts
Just gonna stand there and hear me cry
Well that’s alright because I love the way you lie
I love the way you lie
I love the way you lie

[Verse 2 - Eminem]
You ever love somebody so much,
you could barely breathe when you with ‘em?
You meet, and neither one of you even know what hit ‘em
Got that warm fuzzy feeling, yeah, them chills, used to get ‘em
Now you gettin’ fuckin’ sick of lookin’ at ‘em
You swore you’d never hit ‘em, never do nothing to hurt ‘em
Now you’re in each other’s face spewing venom in your words when you spit ‘em
You push, pull each other’s hair, scratch, claw, bit ‘em
Throw ‘em down, pin ‘em, so lost in the moments when you’re with ‘em

It’s the fate that took over, it controls you both
So they say, you’re best to go your separate ways
Guess that they don’t know you ‘cause today,
That was yesterday, yesterday is over, it’s a different day
Sound like broken records playing over
But you promised her, next time you’d show restraint
You don’t get another chance
Life is no Nintendo game, but you lied again
Now you get to watch her leave out the window
Guess that’s why they call it “window pane”

[Chorus - Rihanna]
Just gonna stand there and watch me burn
Well that’s alright because I like the way it hurts
Just gonna stand there and hear me cry
Well that’s alright because I love the way you lie
I love the way you lie
I love the way you lie

[Verse 3 - Eminem]
Now I know we said things, did things that we didn’t mean
And we fall back into the same patterns, same routine
But your temper’s just as bad as mine is
You’re the same as me
When it comes to love you’re just as blinded

Baby, please come back, it wasn’t you, Baby, it was me.
Maybe our relationship isn’t as crazy as it seems
Maybe that’s what happens when a tornado meets a volcano
All I know is I love you too much to walk away though
Come inside, pick up your bags off the sidewalk
Don’t you hear sincerity in my voice when I talk?
Told you this is my fault, look me in the eyeball
Next time I’m pissed, I’ll aim my fist at the drywall
Next time? There won’t be no next time
I apologize, even though I know it’s lies
I’m tired of the games, I just want her back. I know I’m a liar
If she ever tries to fuckin’ leave again,
I’ma tie her to the bed and set this house on fire
I’m just gonna

[Chorus - Rihanna]
Just gonna stand there and watch me burn
Well that’s alright because I like the way it hurts
Just gonna stand there and hear me cry
Well that’s alright because I love the way you lie
I love the way you lie
I love the way you lie

I think I am pulling you down, making your life in shambles. I think i know what you mean after seeing Wen Jun’s FB photos this early morning. You may disagree with me but you are in the same calibre as her, up there, high up. Your lives are suppose to be flying high too, people will compare and comment and say, ‘hey, that’s the right guy for her’.

Jun has Wayne - tall, dark and accomplished, not to mention he drives too, and it’s true, after seeing the photos i was like, ’hey, that’s the right guy for her’. But you, so high up once, living in the glamour of riches and affluent, banished into this common mortal unstable condition. Indeed, I always argued that I tried my best for you, but is my best the best for you, I don’t think so, obviously the people around you don’t think so and I believe you are starting to not think so.

Baby, you know, I was so used to being alone last time that initially when I am with you, it felt weird to have someone to care for me and actually be there for me. I guess I am a normad, wandering around, trying to blend in the surrounding but now, I am used to having you around, having you scold me, lecture me, grumbles alot alot alot and of course, sayang, love and care about me. It saddens me to say this, but I guess I can get used to wandering again, so please don’t worry about me.

Baby I loved you. If anything, please at least let us spend a nice weekend next week. I wishes, biggest wish in my life, to spend your birthday, my birthday, christmas, new year with you but for now, a weekend is enough.

With alot of loves,

Han Lin aka A Beann

The Scientist

Come up to meet ya, tell you I’m sorry
You don’t know how lovely you are
I had to find you, tell you I need ya
And tell you I set you apart
Tell me your secrets, and nurse me your questions
Oh let’s go back to the start
Running in circles, coming in tails
Heads on a science apart

True

I’ve waited all my life to cross this line
to the only thing thats true
so I will not hide
its time to try anything to be with you
all my life I’ve waited
this is true

I know when I go
I’ll be on my way to you
the way that’s true

Look at the stars,
Look how they shine for you,
And everything you do,
Yeah they were all yellow